photo by threelittlebirds (Mindy J).
i reach for him
my body already numb
from too much pinot noir
and anticipate his rejection.
i know he doesn’t mean it but god does
it hurt that he’s left me with only
the shell of his body, his inner core
on retreat in the world of sorrow.
i deal with life for the both of us.
i repaint the pink walls white.
i donate the little dresses to charity.
i put the picture books into boxes
unable to keep from reading each one.
my fingers caress the brightness
on the pages. i hold the hard covers
against my face, nudging the word
love that always seems to be in
the title with my cheek.
leap into me love
never let me go.
tonight the boundary
between our worlds finally collide.
when i reach for him
he lets me hold him.
he lets his body relax into mine
and i feel a piece of darkness
slip out from under us.
you are my sunshine
my only sunshine i say
rubbing his back
kissing the tears away.
we were supposed to sing it to her
i say as our bodies rock back and forth
finally wading through the pain together.
inspired by a readwritepoem prompt about light
readwritepoem prompt: start a poem with the line when I watch you
when i watch you, you grimace and stick your tongue out. you give me the middle finger. you pull your collar up around your mouth. you stare back, determined to win this contest. you turn your face slightly to the right so i can only see your profile. you slowly lower your bra strap. you reach your hand down my sweat pants. you kiss the corner of my lips, watching me until the closeness blurs me from you.
“what do you see?” you ask. you point to the chicken pox scar on your forehead, which i kiss; your curly hair, which i stroke; the slightly forward way your shoulders arch, which i envelop.
“i see you, leaving and returning to me. shy, brave, sad, joyful little flashes of you; i love them all,” i say.
you blush, and turn off the light.
“now what do you see?”
“you happy. i can hear your smile.” i trace the curves of your lips in the dark with my fingers, and hold you close until you pull away.
“you scared to be happy for too long.”